So I’ve been cheating on my boyfriend…..with Chuck Bass.

okay not really, but I’ve been listening to that new song “Womanizer” by Britney Spears and it reminds me of him. He is also my favorite character from the show Gossip Girl. Last season it was Serena and Dan, but they just irritate me now. Chuck is much more intriguing.

Why does this character interest me? because he is wounded and takes it out by being not only a great business man, he is also cunning, clever, devious, and is probably awesome in bed.

SO many times I find myself saying, “OH! Chuck you are so bad!” But then I remember his epic line: “I’m Chuck Bass.” and then all is well again.

So life is just a game to him, so he has slept with a million girls. He is damn entertaining to follow as a character, and well, the guy who plays him on the does a great job.

Oh Chuck, you just so sexy!!

Since my last post, I have downloaded the first three seasons of Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, you know, reliving my childhood. Of course, I want to see the episodes with the White Ranger, who besides the Pink Ranger, is the coolest ranger of them all. And there are definitely some things that I am watching now that I did not pick up on before.

First off, some if not most of the acting is terrible. The better actors though, are the ones who suck at the fighting. Those who can fight were obviously cast for that reason and not for their acting skills. However, Billy, the blue ranger, sucks at both. He just makes a good nerd.

Speaking of Billy, I am really amused that he has a lab, and when he types it is really obvious that he is just hitting keys. And seriously, unicorn thunder zord power? Unicorn? Oh that’s manly and strikes fear into the enemies.

Next, how did they not get in trouble for the obvious stereotyping of colors to races. Asian girl – yellow ranger? Black guy – black ranger? The only thing I was pleased about is that the Black guy, Zach, is not the token black kid. There are actually quite a few extras were were black. This show is more diverse than my college.

One really good aspect of this show is the villains. They are actually good actors. Rita Replusa is hilarious, and Lord Zedd is actually kinda scary. Goldar, the strange hairy winged creature with gold armor is mildly bad ass himself. But more for comic relief than anything else.

Of course the real comic relief comes from the two bimbos, Hulk Bulk and Skull. Just being the retarded gangsters punks and what not.

Currently I’m watching the one where the white ranger is introduced. He is of course, the coolest of them all, and with Saba, can’t be beat. I might have to go watch the movie now. Mmm MMPR marathon night. Can they defeat Ivan Ooze once again???
They really need to make the traditional Power Ranger costumes and props avaliable. That’s what I want to be for halloween. I’d be off fighting crime with my own talking sword. Tight spandex? oh hell yes. I’d be kicking so much ass, or at least getting some.

Oh, and seriously, the power rangers theme song is awesome. I’m adding it to my workout play list for sure.

Ah I love trips down memory lane.

It took me right around 10 hours, but I finished it.

I was really surprised, I spent so long avoiding spoilers. But there wasn’t really anything to spoil.

You saw that ending coming since day one.

But it was still uber badass.

Oh! and for the record, My boyfriend (who ditched me to get the book at midnight), I finished before he did, and I got the book at 10:30am the next day.

In light of Britney Spear’s recent shows at “The House of Blues,” and her beginning attempts at a comeback, I have created a short list about why this can never happen. Thus, I give you:

5 Reasons Britney Spears Wont Make A Comeback (at least not a successful one)
1. She has babies. The sheer idea that another man has violated that sacred hole that is Britney Spear’s Vagina is enough to turn away most men. Except for maybe my boyfriend, who claims he would still take a crack at it. I politely reminded him of the Twinkie in the tunnel phenomenon.

2. Her lack of natural hair. You just know that during at least one show, her wig WILL fall off, and she WILL be laughed at, and she WILL cry. And that right there, would end a career that could not even be destroyed by the lip singing fiasco. No, I’m not talking about Ashely Simpson. She has acid reflux remember??!!?!!?!!11one!?!!

3. Her… Habits. Among these include, poor grammar, not showering, forgetting underwear (actually that one might help), eating crappy foods, and not being in general very clean. The poor grammar one is really just a pet peeve of mine, and probably wont affect her career other than make people think she is stupid, which, most of us already know.

4. K-fed. Come on. Do I need to say it? Anyone that thought he was a talented rapper has no musical taste, thus, will never make a comeback in the music industry.

5. Her new music. Granted, she has nothing out yet, but we know what it will be about. She made her money singing about seducing young boys, and becoming a woman, yada yada. Well, she can’t sing about any of that anymore, so she has essentially lost her audience. No one between the ages of 14-19 really wants to hear songs about her children. Children, while cute, are not really… a good idea at that age, and are not what girls want around that time. So if she writes songs about how much she loves her babies, no one is gonna wanna hear that. Yeah, we know your kids are amazing. They are also the product of two very screwed up people. No, we’re not impressed. And I swear, one song about K-Fed, and it’s all over.

So I saw 300 a few weekends ago, and I have to say, best movie I have seen in year. Yes, years. I haven’t enjoyed a movie that much since LoTR.

I couldn’t believe that this was originally a graphic novel. I had never heard of it before and was personally amazed. And I hear they did a pretty good job taking it from the book to the big screen. Although, we can all agree that it is not historically accurate in the least. But you know what, we are all okay with that.

After seeing this movie, Two things ran through my head. 1) I want to start my own Spartan community, and 2) I want to have a 300 party.

If not a Spartan community, than I just want my child to be a Spartan. I will teach him/her to fight and all that good stuff. I figure at the right age, I will release my child into the wild to learn to fight, kill, steal, etc. He/she will also fight wolves and not be affected by the cold.

I feel that this would be an excellent idea, mostly because I don’t want my child to ever get beat up, or retreat. I always admire a fighter.

As for my 300 party, I got the idea walking out of the theatre. The only reason I really want to have the party is so that I can dress up like the queen. She was HAWT! I pretty much want to BE her. My hair is already very similar to hers, I just need to make that costume.

Sometime during the summer I’m going to invite 300 people, and everyone has to dress up. I will be the queen, my boyfriend has already claimed the King. See I would use the character’s name, but I don’t know how to spell them, and I’m too lazy to look them up, and I don’t want to look like a dumbass. But continuing on. I also want to find someone to be the Persian king, as well as a few thousand people who will be Persians. This way, we can have all the hot boys dress up like Spartans, because honestly, no 6 pack? No one wants to see that. Plus, we need people to fight! There will be a large battle, where all the boys will fight and all the women will… look hot. Maybe I’ll get a senate together and find someone I can stab. Excellent.

I have to say though, the movie itself, was absolutely amazing. The cinematography was extraordinary. The angles, the effects, and how everything was done on a green screen? That must have been so hard to act! Not to mention how dedicated all the actors were to work out that much to get those abs? JEEZE! Not to mention, the costumes….were amazing. I want to be a Spartan.

Now she is wearing a wig. This frustrates me. She should wear that bald head with pride! Or at least, she should have said she was making a statement for cancer patients everywhere. Or maybe she is making fun of cancer. That bitch! No one should make fun of the big bad C-word.

I’m going to be honest, when I saw that Britney Spears had shaved her head, I was actually shocked. I thought all her barefoot adventures, her divorce, and her cooch-flashing was just a publicity thing. Apparently there is actually something wrong.

Personally, I don’t think she looks all that awful bald. She just looks more… at home. She is more white trash than she could ever have even tried to be before. I wouldn’t be surprised if she started making appearances at white supremacy group meetings and joined the Skin Head clan. I bet her tattoo really means “White Power.”

All this talk about her making a cry for help, and her nothing knowing herself has really shifted some focus back to her. The problem with this: did anyone ever stop to wonder what happened to her kids? For a while, I forgot she even had kids. I don’t think she does, I think she sent them back to the store where she bought them. Maybe Kfed took them hostage in an attempt for more money. Little did he know that obviously, the public cares more about Britney’s hair than her kids, and we all know Britney doesn’t care about her kids, so I think Kfed probably lost in that deal.

Does anyone know the name of the second kid?

Britney is just trying to steal Anna Nicole Smith’s thunder.

And earlier today, I was watching tv and someone decided to ponder if Britney could ever be a pop star again. HAHA Of course not! She had kids! No one wants to sleep with her anymore, her voice is shot, and um… have you seen her lack of hair? She should start going by the name “Cue ball.”  For a while I also forgot she had a career before all this. Seriously, she has reached the level of Paris Hilton. Now she is famous for nothing but making headlines.

It’s sad.

And I’m willing to be money a bunch of girls now are going to want to get their head shaved. But on the bright side, I guess this means the Cancer Patient look will be totally in this season.

So as of 11/6/06, Britney Spears and K-Fed are no more.

I did not find this break up nearly as stunning or tragic as Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston’s, but I was actually a bit shocked.

I had figured Britney had fully embraced her white-trash self and would never leave her hunky piece of man-meat. This said with sarcasm, of course. Honestly, I had high hopes for Britney and J.T. back in the day. I mean, talk about hot pop-iconic babies. Such babies could have joined forces with Brad and Angelina’s baby to fight the evil forces brought forth by Tom Cruise and Katie Holms’ baby Suri. It would be like the apocalyptic battle of our time.

Think what it will be like when those kids grow up. Hot. Rich. And born with sworn enemies (or at least we all like to think so). I think I will get into the tabloid business, things are going to really take off in about 13 years. yeah that’s right, Unruly teens. You know you’re afraid.

But anyway, back to the break up. Apparently K-Fed didn’t even realize the marraige was falling apart! Maybe this springing divorce on the husband thing is taking off in Hollywood. Same thing happened to Nick and Jessica. I personally call Nick, Pussyboy now, because honestly…his past three new songs… I don’t need to explain further. I’m looking to K-fed renditions of them though. Should be interesting. They should form a support group.

Not to mention, apparently Britney dumped him through text messages! Now THAT is cold. That almost makes me feel bad for K-fed, because even I have never been dumped through text messaging, and I have had a few lousy ends. I’ll have to talk about that one of these days.

Well, now with two kids, and a less than talented ex-hubby, Britney is back on her feet (after being off them for so long, i mean geeze, was she ever not pregnant during that marriage?) She is actually looking pretty good. I’m happy for her.

But we will never forget the two years of Spederline. Ah what a wonderful, white-trashy, run it was!

RIP SPEDERLINE!!!

Saddest thing about this post? That I actually follow this shit.