Every year I say I’m going to do this. Every year…I don’t. But this year, seeing as how I am a creative writing major, and tomorrow is Nov. 1st, I felt like I should at least act like my major. Oh, and I have a plot this year. So I’m already three steps ahead of myself from last year.

I think I’ll post excerpts every now and then here. Please keep me motivated!

So another Halloween weekend passes. Screw the 31st, it’s all about the weekend before.

So my costume this year was Daphne, from Scooby Doo! Surprisingly enough, people kept getting me confused with Velma. How the hell to you

make that mistake? Hot one, Ugly one. Seriously.

But regardless, I still had a great time. Got hit on by at least 5-6 guys, which always makes me feel good.

Lets see, so I hit up this party. 2$ cover for all you could drink. Three different kinds of shitty beer and everclear junglejuice! Which is rare in Ohio seeing as everclear is illegal to buy.

The first thing I notice is this guy dressed as a full on Spartan from the movie 300. His costume was incredible. Talk about dedication, he said he even shaved his legs then covered them with duct tape to look like sandals. I was seriously impressed. Then again, he hadn’t been drinking enough so he was obviously not being totally honest with me. I realized this when I told him I was a creative writing/journalism major and he tells me his dream is to travel around the world and write autobiographical fiction. Apparently I don’t get retarded drunk, so I could smell that bull shit a mile away.

Of course, I was pretty pleased that he thought I was a Junior. I felt bad, I had to tell him that I was actually a freshman before he tried to take me to the clubs or something. To which he seems a bit let down, and asks “…so…you’re 18 right?”

haha. Love that. He later lost interest and I decided to find my friends so I had an easy roll off, told him it was nice to meet him, then went to get more beer.

So my favorite part of the whole night was while I was just standing around, and this guy walks by, stops, and looks at me. He goes, “You have a very pretty face.” He pauses. Then he comes over to me, grabs my head, gets up in my face and says “I LOVE YOUR FACE!” Then he kisses my forehead, and walks away.

I felt so pretty! haha

Then some guy starts hitting on me, and he was just straight up creepy. I tried to roll off (a phrase I totally got from The Pickup Artist <3 that show) but the guy kissed my hand then kept staring at me while I was with my friends. Then when I went to get another drink, he corners me! Starts trying to get me to be his beer pong partner. Thank god my friends came to the rescue and decided we were leaving.

The crowning moment was the next morning when my friend texts me “I made out with [guy friend I came with].” I laughed out loud at brunch, and people looked at me funny.

Then came Saturday night. Went out with the girls, and we got snuck into a List Frat party, which means we needed wrist bands to get in. We called a guy, and he came out with 6 wristbands haha! Of course the place was PACKED. At one point I was literally smashed up against a speaker, and could not move. A girl behind us keeps yelling “PUSH THROUGH!” My friend Megan turns around, and tells her there is no where to push to, it was packed. To which the bitch replies, “Maybe you don’t understand. We’re kind of a big deal around here.”

Thank got Megan didn’t hit her. Personally, I just assumed that being a “big deal” means your the Frat’s designated sperm dumpster.

We left that mess, and headed to the track party. We walked right in since D is on the freaking track team, so she and I got darn good treatment. A guy dressed as Scooby Doo was hitting on me, and that was entertaining. I think he left with a friend of a friend though. I think guys are more gutsy on Halloween, in their costumes.

I ended up dancing with I believe on of the guys from Wayne’s world, some guy in a disco suit, and then my friends ex boyfriend. ooooh goodness.

Well, we danced and well, when I dance, I apparently get really into it, and uh, so did he. Nothing happened, because I’m a good girl and I love my boyfriend. But he got my phone number. I figured it was okay since he was always hanging out with the girls and I, we were all friends.

Well, we decided to leave, and he texts me at least 5 times asking if I was okay, yada yada. He even sends me a picture messages, with no picture..asking for a picture?

I get back to the dorm and my friend Emily is in the hall. She lost her room key and her roommate wasn’t back yet. So we were talking, and Mike, the ex, keeps calling me, so I give Emily the phone, and she tells him to stop calling me. Then for some reason, he thinks my name is Sara? But we corrected him, then out of the blue he thinks my name is Christian? ummm..k? But he was raving about my dancing.

He is taking the breakup with my friend really hard so he has been drinking a lot, thus that night he was blackout drunk, and I haven’t heard from him since. Thank God! I really don’t need that drama.

Plus, I love my boyfriend

Overall, It was a darn fun Halloween and I got a super ego boost! SOMEONE LOVES MY FACE!!

So in every dorm there are RAs and usually their job is just to make sure no one dies or causes disruptions. Otherwise, they should stay in their rooms and be around for questions.

My RA is absolutely awesome. I eat dinner with her and we share drunk stories and gossip. She’s hella cool. But her staff is not quite as awesome as she is.

There is one RA in my Dorm that seems to think he is God’s gift to discipline, and that he must enforce as many rules as possible, but at the same time, he has absolutely no boundaries.

Now, I might be slightly bitter that he wrote up a friend of mine for drinking with absolutely no real evidence other than the fact that he “smelled” like beer. Suuure… But regardless, that’s not my major complaint about him.

For some reason, this RA, who we all call “Pony Tail” because he has long hair that he always pulls back in a tight, girly pony tail, seems to think he does not have any boundaries and because he is an RA, he can say whatever we wants to us.

The first time I felt he wasn’t sure where to draw the line was when I was watching tv with him and some other people and he starts telling us about his sexual exploits. He tells us that he’s all about pleasing the woman, and he doesn’t care if the woman reciprocates. Then he shares with us that he has done everything but vaginal sex, because he is just scared of babies.

I had a major WTF?! moment right then. Dude, you don’t share that with people. *shudder*

The second time I had a run in with Pony Tail was while I was sitting in my room with the door open, and I was texting my boyfriend when he walks in. I shut my phone since I don’t want him to read it, to which he goes “ohhh someone is having text sex!” he didn’t know I was texting my boyfriend. Then he turns to my roommate and goes “You’re roommate is a dirty whore!”

…..WTF DUDE. When is it EVER okay to call a girl a dirty whore? At that moment, I no longer respected him. He barges into my room, accuses me of sexual acts, and then with no basis calls me a dirty whore? SO NOT OKAY.

But that’s just my run ins with him. He has also talked to girls in my hall. One girl told us that he walks into her room, and has a twenty minute conversation with her about her period and birth control. Another girl reported him talking to her about sex. And for some reason he felt it was okay to call another girl “Porn Girl.”

Now, I know for a fact that it’s not okay for any guy to say these things. And he is an authority figure. No one respects him.

Talk about some serious sexual harassment.

We reported him to our RA, and he has been thus forth told to not go near our corridor. Hopefully the rest of the corridors will start reporting him too because I know there are more complaints.

So from about 5am - 8am I suffered multiple bad dreams, multiple awakenings by RM, and multiple bodily issues. Let me begin.

First off, I had a dream that I was at a party. Good beginning right? Parties are fun, meet new people and such. Well, I walk over to these two people exchanging numbers to chat. Turns out, the guy is giving the girl, who also happens to be the floor whore, my boyfriend’s number. I mention to the guy I know him and that I’m his girlfriend. He is excited, starts talking to me. Then drops the big “so I heard he was kissing [random girl’s name] again the other night.”

I was DEVASTATED. and what’s worse, is I woke up feeling the same way. I woke up wanting to cry. Dream cheating sucks man.

Then, after managing to fall back asleep, seeing as RM had woken me up with her obnoxiously loud alarm clock at about 6:50am, I started to dream about my neighborhood back home. Thing was, I was watching all these cops run around to try and stop some guys from blowing shit up. Now, sounds cool right? It was cool until it somehow became my dorm room, and these random loud cops kept running in and out of my room. (Once again awoken by RM, roughly 7:2am0) Then this one cop comes in with a large loud cleaner thing, and then starts going through my underwear drawer and folding everything. (Awoken by roommate, roughly 7:50am. She is finally leaving for class) Then, because I’m freaking out in my dream, I ask for an advil or something from the guy. He hands me a pill, I take it. Next thing I know, I’m freaking the fuck out in my dream, and rooms are combining, there are like 9 people in my room with about 6 beds and desks, and loud ass music, and I realize the cop totally slipped me some nasty shit.

Then, I am rescued by RM from my dream (hah) when she calls me at about 8:16am to let her into the dorm because she is standing outside and totally forgot her ID card that she needs to (1) get into chem, (2) get into the dorm, (3) get food. Good work sweetheart. So I had to go downstairs after just waking up to let her in. I must have been a sight.

My alarm was set for 8:30, since my class started at 9:30. I didn’t bother to go back to sleep.

So I head to the bathroom to do my morning crap. Two shitty things occur.

(1) I realized I have started my period. GAH. As good as this is for knowing I wont be having babies, still sucks for the fact that I have to deal with it for the next few days.

(2) My navel piercing hurts like a MOFO. I was laying in bed and it throbbed. I stand up and it throbbed. I tried to wash it out and I almost cried it hurt so bad.

and now I’m pretty sure it’s raining outside, which mean I have to walk across campus to my stupid lecture class that I don’t actually have to show up in except to turn shit in, and I’m gonna get soaked, cold, and probably catch a fatal illness.

Today is going to suck royally.

So its two months today since I got my navel pierced, and I finally couldn’t take it anymore. I had to change it. Hopefully it was healed enough! I took a picture! Unfortunately, having it now just makes me want to do cruntches. But I thought I would share with everyone! I’m SUPER excited about it.

And you know you love my penguin boxers.

EDIT: it is so freaking irritated right now, I want to cry. Not infected…yet. But it’s bright red, puffy, and sensitive all around the top. Switching rings was such a bad idea. stupid stupid me. It hurts right now.  *cries* god please get better

The one thing every man hates is “The Chick Flick,” or the movie his woman forces him to watch that he will later have to either deny till his death to his man friends that he saw it, or claim temporary insanity. However, I feel like men underestimate the power of a chick flick. Nothing puts women in the mood more than watching other women find true love, which always seems to happen at the end of a chick flick.

Now, people will always use the movie theatre to make out, and if you’re feeling extra randy and daring, oral attention. That’s one more thing I envy about men. Not only can they pee standing up, but its much less difficult for them to get oral attention in public places. Back to the point. While some people see the theatre as the ideal place for this, renting a chick flick and taking it home to cozy up and watch can be so much more rewarding.

Girls should only take their girl friends and their gay friends to see chick flicks in theatres. Not the boyfriends.

But, when renting and cozying up to watch the elusive chick flick, men should not cringe at the thought! Think about what women want. We want that idea relationship and true love. What better to brain wash us into thinking he might have that than a chick flick?

By the end of the movie, if the man is still awake, there is an excellent chance that all the pent up sexual tension from the movie will be transfered. While the woman may not be say…..thinking of you in particular, you’ll still be getting some.

I know personally, at the end of a chick flick, all I want to do is make out with someone. Then have a pillow fight in my underwear with all my chick friends, but that might just be because we usually watch chick flicks at sleepovers and that’s just the logical aftermath.

So men, next time your woman wants to stay home and watch a movie, suggest a chick flick. She’ll cuddle you during the sad parts, might even cry. Be excited, that means she’s really into it. Then at the end, when she is swooning and you hear that heavy oh so dream-like sigh, that’s when you put your arm around her and kiss her cheek. I can almost promise every time this will end in a heavy make out session. Now, oral sex and actual intercourse, not guaranteed. That depends on your game.

So this long weekend (Friday, Saturday, and Sunday) is what my school considers “Fall Break.” Since most of my school is in-state kids, pretty much then entire campus has gone home. My entire dorm has gone home, except for maybe 6 people, including myself.

Unfortunately, this means I have no party partners in crime, and god knows even with my black belt, I’m not going to be wandering around campus in the dark….by myself….drunk…. I just don’t see that ending well. Especially with all these police reports of a 40 year old man running around flashing and exposing himself to people.

I love that we have so little crime here that the police need to report a townie exposing himself rather than the usual rapes, armed robberies, and battery that one usually hears about on college campuses.

But anyway, this means I have three days with no roommate, not hall mates, and lots of homework. Essentially, I expect to be chilling in my room naked, munching, and writing papers. Yes, that’s right, I said naked. I wont have a roommate, what better time to free the goodies?

I suppose I’ll have to put clothes on to eat actual meals, and go to the bathroom. But if I stop drinking 6 water bottles in two hours, that hopefully won’t be too much a problem.

All I really want to accomplish this weekend is to clean my room, get all my homework done, and start working on some of my writing. I’m a freaking Creative Writing major and I haven’t written anything creative in over a year. There is something so sad about that. I’ll put some of it up here if I get it written.

Sorry I don’t have something more exciting to talk about. During the week I tend to lock myself in my room and study (aka watch family guy). My friends all go out on Wednesday nights, but what do I do? I watch America’s Next Top Model and Gossip Girls of course! Oh, and South Park. Can’t forget that fabulous show. Last week was a To Be Continued! FHDFHDO;AFA!

And I can’t help but complain that because of gay baseball, there was NOT a new House this week. I hate when people ruin my House Time. My roommate for example, who from now on is just RM (it would be annoying room mate, but that would be ARM, and that’s just weird). Anyway, my RM seems to think it’s acceptable to talk during House time, that hour long piece of godliness that is House. IT IS NEVER ACCEPTABLE TO TALK DURING HOUSE TIME. I almost wrote a note and taped it to the tv, but then again, no need to start conflict.

but for the record, there is to be no interrupting House time.

So tonight I’m probably gonna watch a movie, do the laundry that has been piling up for three weeks. Get a head start on homework? Doubtful

Oh My God. I almost wet myself it was so cute

My friends had been pre-gaming in the dorm, and they decided that they didn’t want me going to the party I was going to alone, so they walked me there.

One my friends shared this with me:

“I’d be more annoying, but I don’t know where the cops are hiding!”